I am on top of the intern. She is wearing her panties and nothing else. Her skin is fresh and smooth, and the little baby hairs on her thighs undulate to and fro with my every exhale. She has a dreamy look on her face, and I want to believe this means that she is getting off or will soon. I also want to believe that despite my ever-expanding waistline this also means that I am a fucking porn star or at least will be tonight. The reality though, is that the intern is twenty-four years old, and I haven’t been with someone her age since I was twenty-four myself.
Still, I should find this invigorating. And I do. It should also be a celebration of some kind. And it is. But if I am truthful, and I want to be, I am also terribly distracted and unable to fully concentrate on the task at hand.
And no, I am not distracted for the obvious reasons. I am not questioning whether I still have the stamina and skill to pull this off, nor am I focused on how I feel about becoming such a cliché. I am also mostly able to ignore the fact that I am not as cool, smooth, good-looking or young as I would like to be. That on paper at least, the intern’s interest in me makes no sense at all. Or, that my wife Liz and I have been married for eight years and that this should somehow factor into how I feel about all of this.
No, what is distracting me is actually more of a housekeeping question. How did I get here? I mean literally, how did I get the intern to come home with me and by what means did we actually get home?
I feel like I should have a better handle on these things if I want to proceed, but I don’t, not at all. I am about to bang the intern and I had no intention of trying to do so, much less believing I ever could.
*You can also hear Ben read an excerpt from YCHMLY on the Orange Alert Podcast. Click Here!
*Read another excerpt at The Nervous Breakdown!